My exploration into the power and joy of saying yes began years ago.
In fact the beginning of my relationship with my husband was built on it. He was amazing and it scared me. I was done with relationships for awhile and then I met HIM. THE ONE. And I thought, “You are not doing this. He is everything you ever wanted. You are the queen of impossible relationships. Don’t get involved your life will change completely.”
And then I realized we were both stunned by what appeared between us. Stunned and careful not to screw it up. We decided to just keep saying yes until something said no.
Back in December of 2015, it began to take a new direction.
I was working on my memoire. I was back to writing as often as possible and I was reaching out to learn more about both self publishing and new apps and ways to work with my computer to make my work easier.
I looked for help and I found it.
I bought Scrivener and started to take an online course in using it. I found The Book Ninja who taught me how to write a kindle book in 30 days in a wonderfully precise course. That led to the creation of Chemo, Cupcakes and Carpools and it’s two companion pieces.
I was about to take another course, this time on how to upload and format a book for self publishing, when my friend, Lida Citroen, advised me to stop taking courses and hire people instead.
A lightbulb went off in my head. I took her advice.
For a writer you need to write. For some, they can do all the uploading and computer stuff that goes into creating the physical product or the ebook. I need to write. It is as natural as breathing to me.
I started to say yes.
Yes to advice, opportunity and help. Three things that women who believe they can and should be able to do it all are sometimes hesitant to accept. I decided to say yes until something told me to say no. I decided to ask for help and I found help.
I now have a team. Like I am a CEO of something. I have a memoir editor who is helping me with that book. I found her 3 years ago and lurked around her facebook and website until I was ready to say yes. I have a couple who help me design, format and upload my books. There were two women who edited the first book before that. One was hired to edit and the other to line edit–the difference being a content edit and a spelling, grammar and punctuation edit.
I hired someone to build this website from scratch and then I hired an amazing young woman to continue work on my website and help with the business side so I can just write. It isn’t cheap but there are ways to find people to help who won’t break the bank.
Three books published, several interviews, classes taught and speaking opportunities later, I now have things moving along. I joined a group of women bloggers and opportunities have come from that as well.
When I get asked I say yes.
I search things out and throw my intentions out there and things are sticking like pasta to the wall. I approach and it works.
I just keep saying yes to what comes, but I also search out opportunities as well.
God helps those who help themselves is the saying, but we also have to put our energy out into the world for that to happen. We cannot hide inside our dark rooms.
I find peace. I find work. I also find frustration that there are not more hours in the day. Being your own boss is tough. You could work 24/7 easily. But I am also a mom and a wife and I want to spend time with my family. Sometimes I need them to understand that I can’t. I learned this year how to turn off. I learned how, but I am not always good at it.
For all of us it is a balancing act.
When I get scared or frustrated or intimidated by the work or the length of my to do list, I have to limit my online life. For someone who loves to research, that is more difficult, and for a woman who enjoys window shopping… all I can say is that I am back to my no purchases for the rest of the year plan!
My life has opened up.
I have met more people this year than ever before. I have brought into my life people who truly value what I value. I am helping others and I am moving forward. I see expansion at a time when others might see limitation. Our daughters are moving forward. One in college one in high school. Their lives are expanding and so is mine.
Try saying yes today. See what happens.