I don’t feel inspired right now. I feel cut off. I am cut off from friends and family and we are all striving to survive. Shopping for food became an all day affair with the goods being purchased online and in person. It doesn’t end. And when it does I am tired and ready to just kick back.
I have been sitting down to journal though–I am trying to get back in the realm of writing and I am going over notes from my editor. Ironically or not we both had covid at the same time! I promise I am going to get back to work…
Just spoke with a neighbor who is a lawyer and an estate attourney at that. He told me he is really busy. It seems there is nothing like a pandemic to get you to take a look at your will! But this week he hit a wall. Just like the wind was knocked out of his sails.
So here is the lesson from cancer…
We are in the tunnel.
There is nothing to the right or left. There is no reverse. There is only straight on through.
It is really hard to keep moving forward. At least I am not alone. We are all in the same boat. Still, I feel stagnant. Maybe because I keep allowing myself to move away from what matters…my writing.
Does it matter?
Who do you write for? Whom do you write for?
I have a couple of audiences. I began this blog when I was a cancer patient and back then it was a place where I wrote about my experiences and wrote my way out of fear. Then I began a book based on my spiritual lessons. The ones I learned through the experiences of my childhood, school, and friends into my adulthood. During my adulthood I lost different things and had different experiences that all shaped who I am. That book is sitting beside me waiting. Those who follow me for my optimism, encouragement and life knowledge are waiting to read it.
The other audience…kids, who read at their level or a bit above, but aren’t really ready or don’t want to be reading YA with romance or violence and just want an exciting adventure story on a smaller, non- dystopian scale. My story isn’t about a kid saving the world. Instead, it is about a kid saving her own world, and creating her own world in which to live.
Remember you have two families –the birth family you are born into, and the other family you get to choose. Fill that one full of friends, hopefully a loving spouse/partner, and perhaps a dog. That family is the one that stays with you. Your birth family may be part of that or not. You decide.
I want to write the first book a kid chooses for themselves.
The moment in the library or store where they pick it up because the cover or the title or something draws them to it, that is what excites me. The book where they read the back then read the first page and don’t put it down again. I want to write that book.
I want to ignite a love of reading.
So if you go back up to the top where I said I wasn’t inspired right now—I guess that isn’t really true. I think what I need is to value my writing enough to admit how much I love it, and then just begin or continue.
The story is waiting for me.
Your story is waiting for you.